Thursday, March 12, 2009

Liberating Old Age

A Senior's Take On Ageing


Old age, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be. Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body - the wrinkles, the baggy eyes and the sagging butt. And often I am taken aback by that old person that lives in my mirror, but I don't agonize over those things for long.


I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for less gray hair or a flatter belly. As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend. I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly cement gecko that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio. I am entitled to overeat, to be messy, to be extravagant. I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.


Whose business is it if I choose to read until 4:00 am and sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50s & 60s, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love, I will. I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the bikini set. They, too, will get old.


I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten and I eventually remember the important things. Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when a beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect.


I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turn gray and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed and so many have died before their hair could turn silver. I can say "no" and mean it. I can say "yes" and mean it. As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.


So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day.

7 comments:

  1. Beautiful post! Society is becoming more and more youth obsessed. Why are some people scared of aging.

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  2. Age to me is how you feel inside. I have a young outlook, so tend not to think of my real . My grandchildren keep me young, I've been known to go down the slide at the park
    (much to my childrenS embarrassment)
    Loved your blog, very interesting to read.
    Keep up the good work.

    Take care.

    Yvonne

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  3. I fervently agree. Society is becoming more youth obsessed. The unfathomable craze for plastic surgeries and anti-aging products in the market are testaments to that.

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  4. Yvonne, my mum has been aging with so much grace. Shes turning 61 next week but age is just a number to her. Her positive outlook towards aging is very refreshing to us :). In your grandchildrens' eyes, you would always be the grandma who rocks ;)

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  5. This is beatiful! I love your thinking and views on life, you're so wise! I hope I can feel the same - I'm working on it!

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  6. Kate- Thanks :)

    Chantel- I'm far off from being wise...trust me! I'm a work in progress just like you :)

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